The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
For sure. We should see if we can get Mike to pay for one, and have a triple kegger... :o==& (that's future me projectile vomiting. i try to be goal oriented)
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
She told me my dick looked like a baby seal wrapped in a sleeping bag.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Why can't people give useful wedding gifts...like sex swings or Nutella?
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
Randomize
