is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Her fortune said that she will soon be free. She's taking her bra off at the table.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
As we were walking to her place she stole a pizza from the delivery guy's car and when we got home she grabbed a slice, two beers, removed her pants, and said "call of duty?" im going to marry her
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