Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
Someone wrote Kyle's bitch on me too. I dont even know who Kyle is.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
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