absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
swears the blind dude on this train is faking. Every day he stumbles and falls into a different girl's lap and then has to grab her tits to steady himself.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
I don't know if it's lucky or if it really just makes my tits look THAT good, but I've never NOT gotten laid with this bra on
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
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