I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
The notary thing was a good idea. I can charge $2 per signature. I'm currently being paid in beer.
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Randomize
