Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
I come back upstairs and she's leaning over sink full of vomit saying 'oh my god it's the chili'
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
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