I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
She said you told her you were ready to be a dad. We just got back from our purchase of the morning after pill. That took me 2 hours of convincing. No more fucking my sister.
1. Thanks. 2. No.
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
