is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
Sorry I banged your sister. But in my defense you ain't fucked me in a month. In fact I should get a medal for keeping it in your family.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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