very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I sometimes forget that turkeys are alive even when its not Thanksgiving.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
He introduced himself to me as "the gayest gay who ever gayed." I like him already.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
