i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
Bought a water-proof vibrator. Rubber ducky is no longer the one that makes bathtime so much fun.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
I just windexed my mirror headboard, Lets get to work.
Is it illegal to hookup with your fathers god child?
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Well it might’ve been because you asked to play What Makes You Beautiful at the club
Randomize
