Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Yeah but the jokes on her right? We just got a new couch and hers still has a cum stain on it from like six months ago
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
Randomize
