Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
I just found your spare underwear and the half eaten granola bar you left in my purse.
They found a chair, duct taped me to it, then gave me a bottle of vodka to 'make me feel at home'
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
