And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
As soon as he lost the election, the reception's open bar became a cash bar. I have never been so disappointed in my countrymen.
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
At dinner her sister yelled "he fucked me AND mom!! Up your standards hoe!!" Safe to say I ruined that family
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
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