She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
