sorry probably not gonna make it :( kinda tied up right now
sad face, r u gay?... wait like really tied up?
:)
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
Please don't think I'm weird for texting you this at 12:08 am but I just found another picture on the Internet where I think you can see his dick through whatever he's wearing
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
So the remote for the camera in the photo booth must have gotten dropped on the floor. while you were in there. having a threesome. on the floor of the room where my parents stay when they visit me. so thanks.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
