normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Smoked a joint with my old camp counselor and now we're going to a strip club. There is a god.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
