fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Tell your sister I'm no fool. Or at least romanticize the notion of the fool.
i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
And I'm only telling you that because I really wanted to use 'my boyfriend' and 'dick biscuit' in the same sentence.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I have found random beers stashed in my purse and microwave... Apparently I thought 2015 was gonna have a beer shortage
Randomize
