ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
his status popped up and said 'probably going to jail.' it took everything i had not to press the like button
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
All I remember from the concert was leaving in an RV full of middle aged people playing circle of death
I woke up and found a stick of butter in my pocket. There's no butter in the house so I don't know who's it is. Using it to make cookies.
I have a lot of questions this morning, most of them start with "Did I..."
I was so high I watched a 5 minute video of different scenes of horses running. The music was magical.
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
Randomize
