In a few years, 50 babies 50 states. Like it?
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
You yelled "bananas are an excellent source of pottasium!"4 times in the middle of class. how do you not remember?
I don't even know what potassium is.
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
On the shuttle bus from the Casino the driver refused to take us to the strip club so you said "let me off this bus or ill puke on you".
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
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