smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
wait did i hook up with someone in mcdonalds last night?
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
I just woke and boke and made apple pancakes. I'm kicking Monday in the dick.
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
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