they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
Can I even tell you how badly I want a day that is just on and off napping and sex with intermittent snack breaks? Because I want that day very badly.
I have never seen a more amazing text message in my entire life.
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
I drunkenly texted ur dad last night telling him he raised great kids hahahahaha
I did something very bad. More specifically, my boss.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
