i just heard the ice cream truck outside while mid-masturbation. i stopped and considered running outside to buy one.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
dude i told her that I loved her...and she said, " go fuck yourself"
I need mimosas to revive my soul
If I look at him, he starts sobbing. Please come get him; he's scaring the cats.
Randomize
