And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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