Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
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