Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
Well, technically I had a shirt on, it was just around my waist.
Very hungover, bought a newspaper and found my shorts from last night in the machine.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
Spent 200 bucks on a stripper for a good night hug. I give up.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
No actually you're a pro. You puked on the cab ride, and managed to completely contain it in your purse. the cabbie was even impressed.
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
Randomize