Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
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