Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i don't even remember going to get food. i think i got gas too.
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I bought us both waterproof cases so we can sext through FaceTime in the shower.
Next. Level. Shit.
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
Randomize
