You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I want to apologize in advance for texting you a picture of my penis tonight.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
