Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
We fucked to the rythmn of the thunder, it was magical
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize
