these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
So i banged this chick from Peru last night. Needless to say, I'm having chipotle for lunch todayas a south American reward to honor her.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
We need to put it on a rope attached to the bong, so it can't be dropped. Apparently, you need a stem safety leash.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I had wine for breakfast at 6am, that's how visiting my parents went.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Yeah yeah I know I have to bring your dog back.
I made a White Russian but saw how early it was and decided to substitute it for milk in my lucky charms. This is what it means to be an adult.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
Randomize
