Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
You told me that you only walk into walls because it makes the room stop spinning.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
I'm still amazed at how you managed to get Doritos in my damn front pocket without me noticing. I got crumbs everywhere.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Randomize
