that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
It was the easiest thing I've ever done. 3am she walked into my room, saw my Buffalo Bills blanket, said go bills and got naked.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
