she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
When I opened my laptop there was a half eaten little debbie oatmeal cream pie inside.
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
He's cheating on her.
Are you sure it wasn't her?
I have my glasses on, and as long as she didn't change her face in the past two months; its her.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
So I found a skull ring inside me this morning. I'm assuming its yours, so I'll leave it in my mailbox for you - it looks expensive.
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
I'm out of breath and my thighs burn but at least it's over.
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