I can't watch pbs sober anymore
oh god the rape fog is back!
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
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