even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
My mom found your leather pants in our guest room. She doesn't want to know why they are there, she just wants to know if you want them washed.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
