well if you came here i would keep you awake :*
did you just kiss me??? ... dude, im not gay
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Found: medium sized pair of mens pants tucked inside my purse w/ a dry cleaners coupon in left pocket. Call if you wish to claim the coupon
I really need to stop drunk texting. My one night stand just agreed to go roller skating.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
I'm glad you have such faith in my ability to find the worst situations with my vagina.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
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