Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
oh fat girl friday strikes again...
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
you inspire me to be a worse person
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
I think I fucked up my elbow when I tried to fight off the paramedics.
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
Think i may just have managed the saddest high-five in history. Finished a sudoku and high-fived myself, then looked around for somebody to high five. there was noone. forever alone.
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
Randomize
