oh god the rape fog is back!
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize
