Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Upon further investigation it turns out it wasn't blood, but chocolate frosting from the cupcake I shoved in my pocket to "save for later"
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
This is classic penis vs brain.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
