So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
my bartender licked my nipple. never stay after hours
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Sex on roller skates
Floating mattress
Tie
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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