I bet her clit looks like pig in a blanket.
I am sleeping on the floor in your room so if you have sex in here just don't roll on me
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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