I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Went to put my shoe on and asked myself why I left a sock in it. I didn't. Needless to say I found our used condom.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
