we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
He just gave a drunken 7 minute speech on how to make the perfect grilled cheese. he explained types of butter and cheeses....i think i love him
thank you TLC waking up to a water birth on tv really put the cherry on top of my hangover...
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I made him fuck me with my coat zipped up and a unicorn mask on. That level of drunk sex. Weird and creepy yet highly satisfying.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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