Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
hey, what are you doing? my roommates are gone for the night... you should come over ;)
nah, i'm gonna grab some food
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
just drew up plans to mow my front lawn into the American flag for world cup. that high and patriotic.
You coming bye my yot got egg sweet carilne vodklaa
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Her stripper name is Geico. I'm not drunk or creative enough to make this up.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
