You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
I need a $60 an hour job, because I have a $50 an hour drinking habit.
You were competing with my dog to see who had the stronger bark....
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
You can make out without kissing
Explanation needed
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
