I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I am getting my wife a tattoo just above her butthole that says, "For entry just add tequila."
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
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