Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
I walked downstairs and there were 50 sorority girls. I wasn't expecting an audience during my walk of shame.
A. What the fuck are period panties? B. Don't ever wear them around me... or bears.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
she keeps trying to brush her hair with leaves and insisting she's not high
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