i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
Apparently I've been blackout drunk doing abstract algebra on the floor
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I supernannyed him into submission
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
