Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Sware then you fell into me doing a Tarzan swing thing and my margherita spilled and shattered all over this guy and sice you were on the ground you tried to pull it off by twerking on the floor lmfao
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Randomize
