Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
Dude their dog does tricks for sips of beer. He keeps going up next to people and trying to shake. This is awesome.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
somehow a ride to walgreens turned into a threesome.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
