All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
I puked in the cab and in my hair and he didnt even know
This just in: I met a girl who does the phone sex phone lines, and shes' 5'4" 320. I'll never get a hardon again through a phone.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
we are learning about oedipus in english. fuck you for making this awkward for me
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
I think he just made me trade sex for my cat.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
Is it rude to say "I hate you because you live inside Hillary Clinton's asshole"?
Randomize
