the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
Nothing says I've got my life together like vomiting on the groom and passing out at your youngests sisters wedding
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Randomize