i wish i could "like" people's thoughts in real life like i can on facebook
you can....by speaking....
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
He just said his penis sings like Mariah Carey...Im going with drunken.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
So the 25yr old smokeshow I fucked last night said "Prepare to be disappointed" as he put the condom on. I was. 40 is bullshit.
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
