if only i could text you this smell
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
I swear that when we jog in the morning I can hear it slap between his thighs
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
how did you set a fucking salad on fire????????
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
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